Siggggh...

I wonder if any of my friends, former or current, got home from school all excited/had tons of fun at a friend's house and then thought about their good pal Jordan. I wonder if they ever thought, "Wow, I'm having all this fun, and he's just spent the night alone." I admit, I probably wouldn't have thought that. After all, there's bound to be someone who's there for that lonely person to talk to!

Well, let me tell you. There's not. Everyone was gone today. Whenever a few people got online, they were too tired or it was too late to talk. It's 7 AM now. This was one of the loneliest nights I've had in a while.

I mean, I got the sound to work on this damn computer, so that's something. I was thinking I could finally Skype with someone, as that seems to be all the rage these days. But no. Nobody was around to talk to.

I have a new hat. It was a gift. It's also a trilby, like my usual hat. But this one's all black, and a little taller than my usual one. I also have a new shirt, a sports shirt. Really thin. It's not tight or anything; it's a little loose. In this shirt, I actually look... slender. In a good way.

I still look thin as a rake, though. And god, I was one cold boy tonight. Seriously, it's the end of May. Why is it so cold? All the people I spoke to sounded.. stiff. I spoke to one girl, she sounded so wooden.

..whoa, there's a lot of birds outside my window. And the city outside looks so empty. I don't even see any shadows; it's that early. The birds' singing sounds like a choir, though. ...holy shit, I thought I saw a black dog. I guess not. Weird. It looked like it was dying. For a split second, I even thought it was a dying man. Then I looked again, and it was a dog, and.. it's gone.

You know what I really need right now? An angel. A fucking miracle. I feel like I've been stumbling in the dark, like some kinda blind man. I need to see the metaphorical light, or some kinda doctor to lift this plague of darkness and let me see the light.

...I'm tired. I'm rambling. I'm gonna go look for some food. If I can get something to eat, I'll be one happy camper.